Thursdays – hmmm what to say about Thursday?
I woke up this morning feeling meh! I walked the kids to school and walked to meet my friend for breakfast (again) and even with the fantastic company I still felt meh! I think the day was sort of happening around me but I was not really participating. I wandered round the shops with my friend but I was not inspired either by shopping or being outside. I seem to have had a non-starter of a day.
On the bus ride home my friend was chatting to me about something inconsequential but my mind seemed to switch itself off. I could see her mouth moving but I made no effort to listen and all at once I almost nodded off. I have not had bus narcolepsy for ages. I used to be this tired every day on the bus going to work andon the bus coming back. I think the movement of the bus had soothed my aching body into sleep mode. I really cant remember stringing two thoughts together over the course of the day.
I picked up the kids from school and we chatted all the way home in the rain. I sat on the couch when I got in and nodded off again. I think the reason for this is total exhaustion, I dont sleep too great and most nights I am lucky to have four hours sleep. I seem to have been okay with this regime for a few years but now I have turned forty this seems to be catching up with me. It could also be that my brain is filled to the brim with more than enough for one person to cope with that it has started shutting down out of necessity. I may be aware of this and be concerned about it but yet again here I am in the middle of the night writing my blog post. Why cant my brain sleep at normal hours?
One thing worth mentioning about today was the wind. There was a sort of magical, bizarre unusual wind in the air. My hair was swept around quite a bit and it all reminded me of the wind in the film Chocolat. I felt like it was bringing changes with it. The wind seemed cleansing and wild but felt refreshing after the dry, hot weather of late. Tomorrow morning I am hoping to change direction. Once I get the kids into school I am going to go for a long walk in the countryside. I am going to clear out the cobwebs in my head and reconnect with myself. I will be taking photographs as I go and will have my notebook with me too just in case I decide to sit somewhere quiet and write a poem or two. As always on my walks I will be joined by my ipod and will hopefully have the chance to sing out loud on my travels.
I have not looked forward to a walk so much. I will be going no matter what the weather. I will update you tomorrow as to how successful my walk was. It would be nice if the magical wind from today could make an appearance.