It is Monday and im actually having an alright day. The kids are on holiday from school for Easter but I had to work but it was all good. I got to work with two friends which is always a pleasure even if the job is less than perfect. I kind of get perked up with writing here every night. I have been trying for years to keep a diary and only now with this blog have I really started taking it seriously. It feels good to pour out my stress onto the screen and let it all go. I know that nothing here is private but that too is okay. I keep everything to myself usually so this is purging in a good way. A deliberate off-loading of worries, stress and inner most thoughts that keep me awake at night otherwise.
Today the topic is a much cheerier one than usual. I have finally made an emotional break from my daily worries and have decided to start a new chapter where I don’t worry about things to do with work. It is a job with no worth and as such does not matter in the big scheme of things. What I want to talk about is passion. I have many passions. Let me explain my passions:
1. Writing is my biggest passion – without it I would be lost. My passion for writing feeds my soul. It gets me out of bed in the morning, warms my bones through the day and hugs me when I am alone at night. I can’t imgine a life without writing.
2. My kids – my kids are the one thing that keep me grounded every day. I would have went off the rails years ago if it was not for having the five mosty amazing people counting on me. I love being in their lives. My day is made better every day just for having them in it. They are loving, clever, beautiful and super talented. They constantly surprise me and watching the enthusiasm for life they all have is inspiring.
3. My Grandkids – My lovely granddaughter and grandson make me very happy. To see my kids givng birth and raising their own babies is a priviledge and a joy. These two little people are bundles of energy, huge personalities and are only babies.
4. Family – my larger family members are varied and magnificent. No two of them are exactly the same but all of them have a story to share, a smile to sooth away worries and huge amounts of charisma. I am ever so lucky to be part of the giant enigma that is my family.
5. Friends – I don’t have the biggest bank of friends in the world but the quality of friends I have is surpassed by none. I have a friend who I tell everything to. a friend I share jokes with and friends for celebrating. Some I see every day and others I hardly see but know they would be there for me in an instant. Some of these friends are also related to me but that makes the friendship so much more important. Not only am I related to these wonderful people but I am honoured to call them my friends too.
6. My dog – My relationship with my dog has grown over the last five years. It has taken up until now when I turned forty to realise that my dog is a life saver. I would lose the will to live some days if it wasn’t for this animal who lifts my mood and magnifies the good things in life. Walking him chases away the depression cobwebs that always seem to linger in corners. He never stops being excited to see me and the way he interacts with my kids shows me that I did the right thing in getting him.
7. Music – I have a soundtrack that goes with my life, it was ever-present in my life growing up. Each of my siblings influenced me in a musical way. My parents were great lovers of music and I feel it is as much a part of me as breathing. I have the most varied musical taste of anyone I know, a mood can always be lifted by the right choice of music but it can also reflect your state of mind when times are hard.
9. Dancing – I always loved dancing to some extent growing up but a real sense of rythmn came to me quite late. I always loved dancing to music videos in private (mostly real early madonna) but when I took my first step into the world of nightclubs it was a step to enlightenment. I found a pub where people were like me, where I could be me without worrying if I was wearing the right clothes or had the right hair. From day one I was accepted into this mismatched bunch of music lovers – real hardcore heavy metal and headbanging was the dance of choice. The love for dancing moved on from here eventually and now I love nothing more than a good party, with great music and dancing. If I don’t have someone to dance with I will dance alone. I don’t care – I just love the expression that comes from dancing, I love the exercise and I love the freedom to just be me.
10. Poetry – I love how some people have the ability to capture a scenic panorama or a feeling in just a few words. I love letting a poem linger on your lips like a caress to the day. A taste of emotion that enthuses the spirit and leaves you wanting more.
11. Reading – the solitary act of reading a book for pleasure is one of my favourite acts. Disappearing for a little while into the imagination of someone else is a true delight. Watching my kids get enthusiastic about reading whilst reading them the same book a million times over also fills me with love and admiration. The way a book can pull you in to a new and exciting world is a gift that should never be under estimated. It is what gives us dreams and the will to pursue them.
These are just a few of my passions which I indulge in every day. Life would be meaningless without them. I am away to indulge some more.
W
bigragerelease 
I love a good dance too. I’m absolutely crap at it but I do like to get up on that dance floor and give it laldy. I know what you mean about your children. When you look at them grown up and as you say they are compassionate, good mannered nice people you think you must have done something right. It is the most terrifying and difficult and responsible job in the world to rear children and you get absolutely no training for it. It’s ike jumping out of an aeroplane without checking out your parachute is working. Your children are all nice well mannered young people and you have done well by them.
Thanks very much Helen. As a single parent I don’t have another half telling me if I do a good job or not so I really need to take the good comments when i can get them. I am proud of my kids but am also proud of myself for the good job I do. We need to have a proper night out so we can compare dancing skills. x
I’m up for that. You should be proud of the job you do. I’ve brought up four. I didn’t get help with the first two but did with the second two but I think the four of them have turned out great. I don’t know how you managed with five on your own. My favourite saying is by Eleanor Roosevelt, she said that a woman is like a teabag. You don’t know how strong she’ll be until she’s in hot water. That so applies to you. x
I love that quote Helen. I don’t have any choice but to cope because I have all these little people that need me to be strong for them. I come from some mighty fine stock though. We are a finely tuned team now though. I see a little bit of my strength in my older lassies every day too. Some times being strong can put people off too. It is hard to let people in as well since it has just been me and my kids for so long.